Video Games

Nintendo’s Amiibo Figures Have Turned Me into Something I’m Not Proud Of

Amiibo - Samus, Captain Falcon, and Josh

When the Skylanders collectible fad blew up, I remained mostly unaffected by it, and when the Disney Infinity thing happened, I ignored it for the most part. (I may have spent a lot of time contemplating the Rocket Raccoon and Groot figures, but I haven’t given in to the temptation to buy any quite yet.) But then Nintendo launched a fresh iteration of Super Smash Bros. and a corresponding line-up of amiibo figurines, and I dove headfirst into this video game-related collectible thing.

Typically, I spend the weekend before Christmas — the most godawful weekend for shopping — hiding inside, sipping a marshmallow mocha, and playing video games. I know better than to get involved in rat races around frozen Minneapolis in search of overpriced knickknacks. This year, however, I spent the weekend hopping between suburbs, hitting every GameStop, Best Buy, Target, and Toys R Us I could think of in an attempt to fill the gaps in my amiibo collection.

I even went to Walmart. I never go to Walmart, because it’s a terrible place to be anytime ever and I try to not support them financially unless I absolutely can’t avoid it. Or unless I need to track down a rare amiibo figure, apparently.

Amiibo - Captain Falcon and Star Fox

I won’t judge you if you happen to be a Walmart regular, but my experience in that store was not a pleasant one. The aisles were packed, people were shouting at each other, and racks of merchandise were literally falling over as I walked past them. At one point, I saw a guy knock over some shelving, and it spontaneously burst into flames as it hit the ground. (Admittedly, that last sentence is a lie, but the rest of the things I’ve mentioned are absolutely true.)

I’m pretty sure I am done with Walmart for good this time, though there are still some amiibo figures I’m trying to track down. And I can’t really put a limit on the things I’ll let myself do in order to acquire a rare Amiibo. Whenever I draw a thick, black line to separate myself from the behavior I consider unacceptable, I find myself crossing it anyway.

This isn’t healthy. This is addict behavior.

Damn it, Nintendo, I’ve got an addiction, and I’m really not proud of what I’m turning into.

Josh Wirtanen owns this place and has opinions about pretty much everything. Follow him on Twitter: @joshuajwirtanen.