This Donkey Kong Amiibo Is a Fire-Flower Spamming Bastard

Super Smash Bros Donkey Kong

Mandi, one of my fellow Lightgun Galaxy writers, has had her eyes on the Donkey Kong amiibo ever since it was first announced. She was quite fond of his jovial dance pose, and I’m pretty sure she spent a good deal of time imagining which song might be playing in his head while he was striking that particular pose.

I thought I would show her what a fantastic guy I am by buying it for her as a Christmas gift, so I did. Unfortunately, that gift would come back to haunt me.

See, in Super Smash Bros., you can earn various upgrades to “feed” your amiibo characters as you play the game. Mandi managed to give her Donkey Kong an item that allows him to start every match with a Fire Flower. Every. Single. Match.

Seriously, this big stupid ape starts every match by spamming Fire Flower. Relentlessly. Here I am, trying to play a gentlemanly, sportsmanlike game of Smash, and here comes Donkey Kong with a fistful of face-charring awful.

He’s pissing me off, and you can tell he loves doing that. I mean, look at that face.

Donkey Kong Amiibo

That’s the face of a cruel, cold-hearted bastard, is it not?

Don’t get me wrong, I love Nintendo’s implementation of amiibo in Super Smash Bros. I just wish Mandi’s Donkey Kong amiibo would stop trolling me.

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